Well, I finally did it. I created a sanctuary/sacred altar out of my house and now I can’t leave for fear of being whisked away by demons.
No, seriously folks, I did invent a spot for contemplating, but we shall see how often I tend to it and/or use it. And, come to think of it, my house is a precise measurement of my personality so it could conceivably be considered my refuge.
Who are your favorite five people?
Ok. Now ask them what is wonderful about you and just listen. Take it in. Say thank you. That’s ok, You can blush.
Here’s what I think about me:
I am fragile yet flexible and strong. I am crazy yet somehow I function and navigate through. I get up and I get down and I get myself up when I am down. I can be extremely emotional, feeling deeply and powerfully, occasionally letting it run my life rather than pausing and taking a breath but I am working on that. And number 5 – I get a kick out of seeing lightbulbs click on top of people’s heads when they have their “AHA” moments.
What does bliss feel like?
Where do you feel it?
When do you feel it?
For me, bliss feels momentous! It’s in the moment and then when I recognize it is bliss, it kinda loses its novelty and it becomes just a memory.
I love the feeling of bliss because it feels like pure, radiant confidence, healing and special all in one tied up pretty pink box with a chocolate bow in one split second.
It makes me believe I am the queen of my destiny and I can give and receive all at once.
It springs forth and feels free. It feels like purpose, availability and openness, like a great big blue wide sky.
It feels divine and I feel it in my cells, bones, tissues and heart.
I feel it when I am immersed in joy, tinkering, or besieged with gratefulness like sunny rays of light specks beaming into my very soul, awash with an overall connectedness to everything. I am one with it all.
Oh yes, it feels like all the stars are in alignment and my chakras are spiraling together like a kaleidoscope.
You ever get that feeling?
It’s called bliss. It’a a spiritual experience.
Have you ever noticed that a great song on the radio will make you want to move and even sing along? I feel stronger and more alive when I am dancing to techno or ’80’s New Wave bouncy tunes. I get a kick out of bopping to uptempo “musique electronique”.
I am inspired when I start and tend a fire. I feel reflective and relaxed when I garden, write, meditate or decorate. These hobbies maintain my sanity and are as necessary as my breath to my very existence. God forbid I shouldn’t have pens and paper, paint and brushes, colorful makeup and markers, flowers outside in my garden and indoors in vases. Like food, my passions feed me and keep me balanced, so I tend to them, like little fires in the hearth.
On the other hand, have you ever known anyone who sucks the life out of you? Vampires really do exist and sometimes they are in the form of family members (no one reading this need be concerned).
What about a job that depletes you? I am exhausted after making a bed but love to wash dishes. I hate laundry duty but love ironing.
So, continuing with our inward journey in getting to know our authentic and unique selves; what puts a spring in your step? what interests make you lose all sense of time? AND also ask; What or whom or both makes your skin crawl or drains you? What tasks do you despise?
It’s good to know what we love but it’s also smart to know what we’re not fond of so we can avoid it or deal with later at a better time or place or delegate.
A couple of days ago, I wrote about our four acts or seasons, give or take a few years of difference for each individual lifetime. Hopefully, you have had a few moments to spare and thought about this a little bit. Maybe even pondered the questions I put forth.
Here are more queries:
As you enter or are in the middle of a certain age group, how have your priorities changed?
What are past choices that do not appeal to you anymore? For example, in my case it would be – staying up late and all day concerts.
What options attract you now? For example, for me, – quiet time, nature walks, even more classical music, gardening, painting, coloring, watching period pieces or uplifting movies and as always, and very much still, strolling through museums.
Ok, now, it’s your turn.
Witnessing yourself, observing your behavior as if you were an outsider, a fly on the wall if you will, is an excellent mode of acknowledging your faults, your talents and your delivery.
The same goes for writing. When you get enough distance between you and a painful memory, it’s easier to expound on in an objective way.
Writing about suffering and grief with detachment and in vivid detail is the stuff of great memoir, as I have learned by reading quite a few.
By the same token, writing about something simple and ordinary in an extraordinary way as if it was unique and special is the stuff of great memoir as well.
From practicing our art, reading, writing, observing and being inspired by basically everything, we hone our creative expression, whatever way that exudes from our soul.
We all have seasons in this life.
According to Carl Jung and his followers, there are four stages or Acts.
For me, I see the ages of 0-20, 21-40, 41-60 and 61 and beyond as those four acts, roughly, because even at 50 some of us are having grandchildren and others, just letting go of their chickadees.
So the questions are:
Where are you chronologically?
What time period are you in?
What’s great about this time in your life?
As my daughter V once pointed out to me – every season has its benefits and downfalls.
This year, the roses are bursting with fragrance or beauty and mostly both. Pink and variegated, white, red, heirloom, peach, yellow, fuchsia and lavenders. All were gifts from the love of my life and all were planted by him, as well.
I am Loving the garden this spring. Here we have alstroemeria in fuchsia pink throats, ombre to light powder pink towards the tips of the petals and spotted dark brown dashes inside yellow mottled bases. Like identification cards, each flower is unique and each variety of the Peruvian lily, as it is commonly named, has markings and colors that make it a favorite item in any bouquet.
And then we have the smallish white lily with lavender and yellow stained petals that I still can’t identify ( see Y3 – Day 81 ) but grows proficiently with neglect in any shady spot I transplant it in since 1987 when I first laid eyes on it by our sidewalk at our first house.
And then I just filled in the display with a few “weeds” that were growing in a semi circle planter abutted to our rear house wall. They were star clustered fuzzy flowers and rosemary like spiked leaved stems. I had hubby clear them out today and re-fill it with three bags of organic soil. Then, I planted multiple colored petunia plugs I chose from Home Depot this morning and sowed four o’clock floral seeds he bought me last week that I had been waiting to disperse for just the right moment and place, which was this glorious, beautiful day!
I have an easy solution to making my vanity which is in pretty good condition look new again. I bought 4 bun feet at Home Depot and painted them with leftover baseboard white semi-gloss.
This is the vanity before.
And this is after. It is a minor addition but I smile every time I look at them because it looks more finished and stepped up (pun intended because of the bun feet) a notch. We also saved time and money by not replacing the whole thing. It’s better to upgrade with what you have environmentally speaking than throwing it all away and never mind how creative it is to turn something old into something new, even if it is a tiny detail.
