Back in October of 2018 I wrote about the political climate and how uncovered or leaked stories were vehemently denied or twisted. It needed to be set right.

I wrote how otherwise we would be railroaded and obliterated.

Power and Control are not collaboration and has a toxic masculine bent.

Networking, compromise and sharing are Goddess traits. It’s about love not fear and anger.

Then, and now, more has been revealed and there are undeniable treachorous acts that are being finally brought to light and discussed. And denied, doubled down even. We need consequences or this will happen again and again and worse.

I go on to ask my questions about how to climb out of the quagmire; the anxiety, the hailstorm of lies, the blatant hypocrisy worse than any description in Orwell’s 1984.

Is cancel culture the thought police?

I wondered if I could go on.

I wonder still how to be a force for good? How do I express myself in a positive, productive manner?

I felt assaulted, abused, gaslighted, bullied, harassed, put down and lied to incessantly. My trauma and collapse came back in full force on 1/6/20. I was weeping, on the floor, flash backing to Argentina during the Junta takeover and the “desaparecidos”, anyone who spoke of politics, disappearing. I called my EMDR PTSD specialist within minutes, sobbing.

Now in 2023, after COVID, BLM, 100 year storms, quakes, protests and despair, more school shootings…ARGH!!!!

Another day, another harm, where I trudge through fear to get to the other side, where I breathe and calm myself so my anxiety can leave me for awhile. My therapist has passed away and I am not alone in my hopelessness. Yet, I, alone can ask for light to come into the dark. When Our fate is sealed is there any room for humor, inspiration or expectancy?

I refer you back to the sixties. And before that, WW1, the Spanish Flu and WW2 and the depression. And further back even more…always we have created situations and made choices that were abhorrent. It’s the light workers, the seers, the shamans, the spiritually fit that led us out of the dark. I go there now with confidence. I seek to connect. I want divine, unconditional love to inform, transform and reform me.

I am alive and I see miracles all around me. I give thanks. And So It Is.

Assertiveness with compassion is not the same as aggression with an agenda. It is the intent of boundaries vs. building walls.

Behind every spoken word is a design to manipulate, soothe, persuade, console, liberate or anger. Shall you speak to support or denigrate?

Some people are fueled by anger, blaming, judging and pay homage to an overall cynical, negative discontent. Other people’s energies are sapped by it.

Where lie you?

Forests instead of walls I say!

Authoritarianism ->Projecting strength and DemoniZing enemies and Dismantling institutions<- WARNING!

Although we didn’t quite get a Blue Wave, Washington got splashed on enough to perhaps, just maybe hope, to put a check on this fascist. We need to start calling it what it is. The sooner we do, the better.

In a fit of panic, my mother called me. “Are you watching the news?”

No, I replied, “I am taking the day off from politics and nurturing myself today.” I proceeded to ask her why, though.

As it turns out, Mr. Orange was spewing how he won and how great he is and on and on, I guess, about lies and fear. She said only someone who has lived through dictatorship could understand her angst. I said, “I know.”

We cannot become a version of 1984 or Germany pre- WW2. Or what made my family flee from Argentina. Every one of us came from a torn family, escaping and/or looking for something. We wanted better for our children. Unless, you are a descendant of an indigenous tribe, or forced into slavery, you were given exile here. We must learn from history, philosophy and humanitarian studies. We still need to put up a fight and we still need to call lies out.

Never have I seen such dedication to the country as those who participated and voted for common decency and Statue of Liberty values yesterday.

I am grateful to the press that hammers away at what is starting to look like an unbelievably corrupt and nefarious, dangerous White House and all their power hungry, greedy, nationalistic cronies.

I will continue to honor my ethics and care for myself today in quiet solitude. In order to be of service, we must preserve our ideals and maintain equanimity within.