I learned a peer just finished her book and was submitting to publishers via an agent. Proud of her but also jealous. And then I started to think about jealousy.
Are we jealous because we don’t appreciate or realize who we are and what we already have? Are we not willing to do the work and go through the strenuous work they did to get what we think we want to have too?
Furthermore, jealous of what? We can be envious of another’s long-lasting, loving, devoted partnership. It doesn’t have to be a manmade object. It can be a goal or an impossibility.
Jealousy encompasses looks, youth, height, attitude, confidence, sweetness, generosity – all things that cannot be changed. Although many try to mask, market and make alterations. But, you can’t change the beauty you see from the inside even in a well worn, tried and true, wrinkly person. And, you may be able to improve your performance or attitude. In that case, comparisons may be a boon to your life, a reaching up for higher levels of love and compassion.
When you have that icky sticky feeling of distaste, ask yourself if you are being used or useful?
You know the answer.
As you grow, you grow out of situations and people. Knowing when and whom to let go of is liberating.
Your time has come and gone with others and eras of life as well.
Closure with gratitude is the final farewell.
Such awareness comes from digging deep. Ah yes, the places that scare you. And then, processing over time and returning to the point over and over again, peeling through more and more layers.
Wisdom and true experiential knowledge can only be achieved or felt by ingesting, masticating and swallowing truths.
The truth will set you free but, ah yes, first, it will piss you off.
What makes me tick? Besides my heart? In addition to my mind? Although all of it matters, I need to maintain my vehicle of spirit, my body. I must engage with self, inside, outside and all around.
After three days of doing nothing once, just putzing around and having no real agenda, just a list of maybe do’s – I found I could think clearly, finally. In this clarity, I heard, “yoga every day.”
Mindful devotion to this body connects me to my soul. Sitting in Meditation my soul connects me to my body. Taking care of the gift of life, I listen to my heart. I flourish and can help others when I rewire my body to soul to mind connection. It’s an energy loop.
As a matter of fact, it does come down to taking care of self. When you are centered, you become available to the world through your own unique talents and offerings. We are each a snowflake.
By transforming, nourishing and empowering myself via different techniques like boundary setting, self-loving rituals and meditation, I can be a force for good.
When all around me darkness, low, encroaching clouds and people with false agendas abound, as death and destruction looms, I can stay serene in my sacred space of devotion, quiet contemplation and inspired wisdom to find the solution within acceptance and my part in it all.
If my part is one of stillness first, then secondly, I will know if I choose to act or be quiet. Do I respond or retreat? Do I deliberate or decide? Do I savor it or let it go?
Reminder to self:
Eating Mindfully – No more senselessly eating in front of the TV. Set the table. Eat outside. Put utensils down between bites. Listen to music or silence. Light candles. Pay attention. Focus. Bring mind to the task or life moment. Check in with appetite. Pause. Reflect.
Also – Walk, wonder, write. My 3 W’s for Women. How can you be authentic if you don’t know who you are?