Furthermore, we find peace of mind in acceptance. Even though acceptance does not mean approval or tolerating unacceptable behavior – it does mean you have to come to terms with a fact, not as you want it, but as it is. It replaces the illusion of control. In essence, an admission we are not in charge of the universe nor does it revolve around us.
For sure, others, not in our particular dilemma, undoubtedly see it clearer than us. Haven’t you in turn solved plenty of headaches for your friends? It is easier to discern what to do when we are not directly involved. For this reason, counseling and therapy services help us.
As an anxious worrier, I concentrated on how to fix other people and the world. A born critic, I wake up negative until I force myself to pray, meditate and affirm a positive outlook. It’s genetic. I come from generations of judgmental, fearful and controlling women, on both sides. Apparently, my primitive female ancestors sat around the village campfire gossiping, complaining and catastrophizing while braiding hair or weaving baskets. Despite my heritage and nature, I now know, the solution lies with me. By placing responsibility on me and what I need to resolve, sort out and re-think, my attitude emerges as an internal barometer of my serenity.