Occasionally, I recognize I have just been given what I call – a God shot
1. It’s the realization that a miracle has just occurred in front of your eyes
2. A prayer has almost instantly been answered
3. Under the guise of a stranger’s words or deeds you hear or get exactly what you need to hear or get
Sort of a synergy that occurs only for you and you connect to it knowing full well you were supposed to be aware of it. Getting chills? You know if you are even half alive, awake and intuitive – YOU have experienced this too.
Yesterday, I walked into a gym, was given a tour by a sweet, persuasive, young woman, and walked out of there fired up, feeling spiritually and personally validated. I had been searching to get physically better under doctor’s orders plus I knew I needed to get moving again, of course. But I went to different gyms and fitness centers and just wasn’t feeling it. I blamed myself for being such a lump; lazy, unmotivated, your basic loser self-talk I engage in way too much.
I parked in front of a place I wasn’t even going to check out at all ever and it even took me awhile to find. I didn’t have too much hope but I didn’t want to leave, as the saying goes, any stone unturned.
“If not now, then when?” The pretty gal asked me.
“Well, I have a fear of being in the midst of a class and hopelessly not following direction” I confessed.
“It’s always uncomfortable the first time and then you keep coming back and eventually you pick it up and love it” She persisted.
“But what if I can only do five minutes or I just can’t do it?” I exclaimed with a tremor in my voice.
“Why wouldn’t you be able to do it?” She countered.
“Because I am not fit and I feel vulnerable and I will probably just make an ass out of myself”, I said to myself but to her I said out loud, “I just don’t feel like I can do it”
And as if she heard my thoughts – she added, ”You can absolutely, positively do this. Maybe you stay for five minutes at a time but you can keep at it and you will feel invigorated and get better each time and then you will have more self confidence and your endorphins will soar, “etc. she went on….
A Thomas Alva Edison First Edition naked bare light bulb hanging from a high ceiling of a dark closet with a chain that I literally pulled, lit up above my head.
Three things I know about myself:
1. When it’s broken down into pieces that I can follow step by step at my own pace – I feel more comfortable.
2. When you tell me it’s ok – just try it again, I probably will.
3. When you tell me this is normal, most people feel this way – I get to acknowledge my part as a flawed human too. And then I can have compassion for myself.
Today, I took a yoga class at the gym with an instructor that mirrored my own teaching style, said almost the exact same reassuring words I have spoken and let us be one with the moment in a creative, safe yet strong flow. I felt like I had given the very same class, many times before and what a gift it was to receive.
Another God shot.
In the last few weeks of searching for a place where I could feel inspired as well as nurtured or at the very least take a well designed yoga class, this has not been my experience (far from it and more on this rant some other time) and it restored my faith in myself enough to stimulate and invigorate a sincere desire to take the ‘scary’ dance or pump style classes as well.
I now have renewed enthusiasm for:
1. Taking responsibility for my own health
2. Finding a new health/wellness home in the most unlikely of places – a commercial athletic facility
3. Knowing I am always being taken care of by the Universe
And if you needed encouragement today, reading this is your God shot